


Pride & Prejudice Drabbles

by Antosha



Category: Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen
Genre: Double Drabble, Drabble, Drabble Collection, F/M, Post-Canon, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-07
Updated: 2020-09-02
Packaged: 2021-03-04 23:55:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25134997
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Antosha/pseuds/Antosha
Summary: Some short 100- and 200-word ficlets set in Jane Austen's garden.Keeping these folks under a hundred words ishard! XD
Relationships: Elizabeth Bennet/Fitzwilliam Darcy, Lizzie Bennet/William Darcy, Lydia Bennet/George Wickham
Comments: 8
Kudos: 36





	1. Baggage (Lydia/Wickham)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Written for one of my birthday drabble challenges.

As the maid—what was this one’s name? they never lasted long—screamed at the twins, Lydia thought that she would go quite mad; her nerves weren’t made for this sort of constant upset, really they weren’t. Didn’t everyone know that? “Wickie,” she mewled, “Jane and Kitty are going to Bath. We must go too, or my nerves shall quite shatter.”

“Nerves,” muttered her husband. “We haven’t the money, baggage!”

Staring at Mr Wickham, Mrs Wickham felt that a veil was drawn from her eyes for a moment and she saw him: fat, faded and cross, improvident and ungentlemanly. “Oh!”


	2. Mrs Darcy Receives a Bath--Pride and Prejudice: Darcy/Lizzie (PG13, for ladytory)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another response to the Drabble Meme--this one's a double drabble (200 words) because damn, are Austen's people hard to write in small chunks!

Fitzwilliam Darcy knew that modesty was an attribute that few would link to his person. Yet even now, ecstatically married, a powerful natural reticence obliged him to avoid his own desire to gaze fully upon his lady wife’s unclothed form, and the only name that he could possibly give that reticence was _modesty_.  
  
She, typically, termed it _silliness_. “Open your eyes, Bill. You’re giving me a bath, not playing at Blind-Man’s Bluff. I have not had my back well scrubbed since I left Longbourn. And Jane is no longer available to do the job properly, so it is down to you.”  
  
***  
  
“If you insist, my dear,” Darcy said, squinting. “Lizzie, you must not laugh at me.”  
  
“Indeed, I must!” said Lizzie. “Your own sister has made me promise to do so no fewer than three times a day; she says that it is an efficacious tonic for your unnatural gravity. Am I so awful to look upon?”  
  
He answered, “You are the most beautiful sight I have ever beheld; your naked beauty threatens to destroy me, and so I close my eyes.”  
  
Lizzie blushed and smiled. “Here’s a sponge. Flatter me again, and you may wash the front as well.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So a few people objected to my having Lizzie call Darcy _Bill_. I'm sticking to my guns, however - it's more aggressively plebeian than _Will_ , as one friend suggested, and therefore more likely to drive Darcy nuts, but you know he'd never admit to it, for want of hurting her feelings... and of giving her more teasing ammunition. ;-)


	3. Awe

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was a present for my friend ladytory's sister, violet451, who was having her 'dark woods' birthday (35), and whom Tory wished to receive prezzies.... She's a Darcy fan and La Leche League member. ;-)
> 
> Warnings: Discussions of such issues as La Leche League members would discuss. ;-)

Darcy had not thought that a wife of his would stoop to feed her own child; that is what wet nurses were for. He himself had been nursed, and of course their mother had died when Georgiana was born, and so she too had been fed at the ample bosom of a local woman. In his mind those two cases settled the matter. How could any child have been better raised than the Darcys?  
  
And yet nothing prepared him for the wave of awe and wonder that overtook him at the sight of Elizabeth, their son at her naked breast.


	4. Pride & Prejudice: The Drabble (courtesy of Microsoft Word)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A friend pointed out to me that you could use one of Microsoft Word 2008's ~~silliest piece of crap bloatware~~ features, the AutoSummarize function, to rewrite fics as drabbles. 
> 
> _Well,_ I thought, _why stop at fics?_
> 
> And so, all for your delight, I present to you: _Pride and Prejudice: The Drabble_

It is a truth universally acknowledged. "Bingley."  
  
Elizabeth felt Jane's pleasure. "Never, sir."  
  
Mr. Darcy bowed.  
  
"Miss Elizabeth Bennet."  
  
"Miss Bennet!" repeated Miss Bingley. "CAROLINE BINGLEY"  
  
Elizabeth silently attended her.  
  
"How strange!" cried Elizabeth. Mr. Collins then returned to Elizabeth.  
  
Elizabeth was in agonies. Elizabeth replied that it was. Oh, sister! Poor Jane! Elizabeth made no answer. Elizabeth looked surprised. "FITZWILLIAM DARCY"  
  
"Oh, no!" said Elizabeth. Elizabeth was distressed. Elizabeth was delighted. "LYDIA BENNET."  
  
"Oh! Elizabeth read on.  
  
Well! "Mr. Darcy!" repeated Elizabeth, in utter amazement.  
  
Elizabeth smiled.  
  
"If! Darcy mentioned his letter. Mr. Darcy! Dear, dear Lizzy."

"Dearest Jane!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyone else catch the lovely, odd throughline of Bennet-cest??? And what's with everyone SCREAMING THEIR NAME???
> 
> XD
> 
> To quote [Leonard Pinth-Garnell](https://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/cast/dan-aykroyd-14846/character/leonard-pinth-garnell-73856), "That wasn't very good, was it?"
> 
> (I did clean up the punctuation a tad. But yeah... LOL)


End file.
